Lifestyle
Make ’em, keep ’em
New Year resolutions can be kept. Sqn-Ldr Belinda Ball looks at some ways to do it.

Volume 49, No. 1, February 8, 2007
How many of us have welcomed the beginning of the New Year with a list of things to do?

Perhaps a resolution of becoming fitter or shedding those unwanted kilos that have accumulated over the past year and over the Christmas break.

While we tell ourselves that this year things are going to be different, within a month or two, more often than not, our list of resolutions lies despondent and unrealised.

Well, with a bit of hindsight, a fair degree of foresight, and some honest soul searching, this year may be the year that those resolutions finally see the light of day.

Where have you been?
Every New Year is full of possibility, and this sense of prospect often propels our ambitions and sparks tempting resolutions.
Swearing that this will finally be the year you lose those last four kilos, tackle your first half-marathon or complete the City to Surf fun run might well begin as an inspiring challenge, but a few years of attempting, and then failing to see them through begins to wear you down.

Were your last year’s resolutions similar to those of preceding years? If so take the time to study them. Write down the things you planned to accomplish in previous years and never did.

What stood in your way or impeded your success? Were you quick to give up? Who were the people that supported you and who were the ones that thwarted your resolve?

Now have a think about your successes, in particular the quiet, everyday successes that lack the fanfare of the big events.
If you keep a journal (always a good idea), skim through it and you’ll rediscover moments and successes (no matter how minor) that you’d forgotten. Glancing through photographs is also a great stimulus for recalling lost moments.
Take the time to write down your proudest moments of last year, and note also your most difficult times. What did you learn about yourself, your friends and your life as a result of all of this? How can you use this self-knowledge to influence the resolutions you make for this year?

Where are you going?
Analyse the significance of your resolutions. Let’s assume you’ve resolved to enter your first half-marathon this year.
Take a sheet of paper, write your resolution at the top of the page and then write down all the reasons why the success of this particular quest matters to you.

Is it because you think the training will improve your fitness and the competition provides incentive? Is it to accompany a friend or to gain praise and recognition? Is it a dream that has never been fulfilled, a promise you made to yourself a long time ago?
Once all of your reasons are written down, go through your list and prioritise each in order of its importance to you. Now do the same with all of your other resolutions.

Is there a common thread that runs through your resolutions? For instance, do they all relate to weight loss, or is external validation, helping a friend or pleasing others a common theme? It’s important to understand why we make the choices we do and why, if relevant, we fail to meet our own expectations.
Choose resolutions that reflect and build on who you are and that honour your journey so far. Consider the lessons you have learned and select pledges that offer opportunities for further growth.

Plan to get there
Planning is often seen as the sad cousin of spontaneity and even destiny. It’s a poor reputation for the most integral component of success, and yet we still use words like “lucky”, “charmed” or “gifted” to describe those people who’ve managed to attain that for which they’ve strived.

But planning involves so much more than scheming a path. It requires that we predict, based on past experience and research, what the pitfalls, barriers and distractions may be, and that we plan how to overcome these obstacles.
It requires that we skill ourselves in learning how to recognise when our motivation is low and how best to recharge our enthusiasm.

What could go wrong
Begin to think about what might happen to cast your plans adrift.
By planning for what might go wrong as well as how best to keep ourselves motivated, we not only improve our chances of success, but we also learn so much more about ourselves and our relationships.

By seeing out the last year with an appraisal of that year’s events – the moments, the challenges, the successes and the lessons learned – and seeing in the New Year with gusto and wisdom, we acknowledge and pay homage to ourselves and growth.