Picking up the pieces
Coping with loss of a woman who meant the world

By LACW Simone Liebelt

Sergeant David Tener and his three sons, from left, Jason, 12, Simon, 9, and Adam, 14, beside a memorial for devoted wife and mother Alison who lost her life in the Canberra bushfires on January 18. Photo by LACW Simone Liebelt

SEVEN months after the devastating Canberra bushfires took the life of devoted wife and mother-of-three Alison Tener, Sergeant David Tener and his three sons are dealing with the tragedy, thanks to the enormous generosity and support of so many people.

Alison was one of four victims of the ferocious inferno that destroyed more than 500 homes – including the Tener’s home of nine years – in the western suburbs of Canberra on January 18.

SGT Tener described the response following the natural disaster as overwhelming, and wanted to thank everyone in the Defence community for their contributions and assistance in his family’s time of need.

“If something this bad had to happen, I’m just so glad that I’m in Defence,” he said. “It would have been a hell of a lot harder had we not had so much help from so many people. The support has been unbelievable.”

After the tragedy, a devastated SGT Tener and his three boys, Adam, 14, Jason, 12, and Simon, 9, not only had to deal with the magnitude of their loss, but had to begin rebuilding the life that had been reduced to ashes. Nothing was recovered from the ruins of their Defence married quarter in the suburb of Duffy, not even a single memento of Alison.

“Our life was literally vaporised,” SGT Tener explained.

“If we had of only lost the home and the contents, I would have been pretty upset and pretty cranky, but given the fact that we lost Alison as well, I really don’t care about that other stuff.”

SGT Tener, with the support of his three brave boys and the help of family, friends and the wider Defence community, has started the long and difficult road to recovery.

He had been posted unaccompanied to Richmond last September, but after Alison’s death was quickly relocated back to Canberra, where he works at No. 34 Squadron.

After an exhaustive search by DHA to find a house in an area that had just lost more than 500 homes, a temporary residence in Duffy became available, allowing the boys to return to their local schools and friends.

SGT Tener then began the difficult task of restocking the new home with everything from lounge chairs to cutlery, while trying to replace important items such as birth certificates, passports and inoculation records.

“It's been quite a challenge to start from scratch,” he said.

“You can’t quickly reorganise what’s taken 20 years to accumulate, especially when you’re still reeling from losing someone.”

While sentimental items such as photographs and home videos can never be replaced, without the many kind donations of furniture, money and household items, the family’s situation could have been much worse with their household insurance amounting to only half its true value.

“I’ve had a hell of an education since we lost Alison, because it’s not until you lose someone close to you, especially your wife, that you realise just how much they did for the family,” SGT Tener said.

“I’m just so glad that I had the boys to lean on.

“We’ve finally reached the point where life isn’t quite as frantic anymore, but there’s so much to tie up and still a lot of very big decisions to make.”

SGT Tener would like to pay special thanks to all his friends and work colleagues from Nos. 34 and 37 Squadron, personnel from DPA, DHA and the Defence Community Organisation, and every Air Force member, particularly those deployed in the Middle East, who have donated money or gifts and offered assistance and good wishes to him and his family.

“I’d like to say thanks in every respect to everyone both within and outside Defence, and also to let people know that this isn’t something we will get over in a few weeks, or a few months, or even a few years, but what they have done and their kindness has helped us enormously. The boys and I are really grateful.”

As a symbol of the generosity received, a handmade quilt dedicated to Alison hangs on the family’s lounge room wall, inscribed with the words: “To the world she was but one woman, but to us she was the world.”

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