LAST EDITIONS PHOTOGRAPH

And the winner is ...

Captain Smith's wife finally made him stop for directions.
Spr L.J. Nugent, 1CER

Army newspaper staff also liked:

Confusing the barge for his ship, Sqn-Ldr Jones knew he was in deep trouble.
Pte Mal Jongedyk, 11/28RWAR

What do you mean this isn't Dallas International Airport?
Cpl Peter Drazic, 25/49RQR

One low-level flyover and this is where my career ends up.
Cpl Chris Place, ADFRC-NQ

I'm telling you sir, it wasn't there last night when I locked up.
Ken Bow, CSC

As the pilot climbed out of his cockpit he realised that his new vertical takeoff and landing jet was so efficient it hadn't even knocked over the witches hats.
Maj Trevor Davis, 30 Terminal Sqn

World weird web

www.tie-a-tie.net

It's winter and a tie is the ultimate accessory for the longsleeved Army polyester shirt that you dread to wear. No need to wear those cheat's elastic-strap ties - tie your own Windsor Knot and impress your friends. Better still, try a Four in Hand Knot or a Pratt Knot. Or pretend you're James bond and tie your own bow tie for the next formal dining-in night. You never know, you may impress the boss enough to get a better annual report this year.

www.bellescarves.com

Get in touch with your feminine side and learn how to tie a scarf with tips from Baroness Bell von der Goltz. Make yourself fit for that trip to Paris with a French Twist or go for that funky Russian peasant look with the Babushka. There's also the just-did-the housework-look using the Brigitte knot. For the more daring among you, scarfs can be used to contain (just) the female chest with scarf-tying classics such as the bikini top and the halter top.

www.fieggen.com/shoelace

It's so exciting! There are 15 different ways to tie a shoelace. With Ian's help you can master them all on those cold winter nights when it's just you, the computer and your favourite pair of lace-ups. You can also learn different ways to lace your laces and calculate how much shoelace you'll need to ensure you have plenty of length to get the job done on your high-heeled sneakers. There's even more shoelace tips, a FAQ section and a shoelace poll. This site has it all.

www.scouts.asn.au/knot_idx.html

Boy Scouts are hard to find on the battlefield, so it's a case of do-it-yourself if you need a knot in a hurry. Where else would you turn to for ropetying techniques but the Scout Association of Australia? They have all the cool knots (as used in the Australian Scouts award scheme) and you never know, there may come a day when the knot-tying badge is introduced into the Army. (It can go next to the Recruit Instructor badge) You can bet $20 that this site will then see more action than John Wayne and Clint Eastwood put together.

If you've visited a web site that might interest our readers, email simone.heyer@defencenews.gov.au (sec: unclassified, WWW Column)