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Only
Joking
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 "say
again over"
CAPTION COMPETITION
If
you can think of a clever, witty caption to this picture,
send your entry by e-mail to armynews@defencenews.gov.au
(remember to send it sec: unclassified) with caption competition
in the subject line.
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entries under 25 words. Entries must include the sender's name,
rank, unit and location. The winning entry will be published
in the March April 21 edition. |
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LAST
EDITIONS PHOTOGRAPH
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And
the winner is ...
It
was then that both drivers realised their vehicles had
slight blind spots.
Tpr E.M. Hale, 4/19PWLH
Army
newspaper staff also liked:
Taronga
Zoo soon realised it's even easier to get two tanks
to mate in captivity than a couple of pandas.
Tpr D. Moretti, 173 Survl Sqn
The School of Armour take the phrase "If you can't beat
'em, join 'em" literally during basic training.
Cpl Dave O'Brien, 19 CE Wks
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Listening
Post
New
jacket trialled
Rumour abounds regarding the new style of jacket being
trialed by Army.
Listening Post can confirm that in a recent trial fitting
of different styles of jacket, the most popular was the
jacket, pictured right.
The jacket, designed to be worn in adverse weather when
in polyester uniform, is still under consideration.
More great ideas
The public are still providing great ideas for Army. The
most recent letter, from a member of the public, suggested
that Army include waxed packages of cheese, meat and salmon
and shrimp paste to improve the variety of meals available
to soldiers.
A return package including a current ration pack was sent
to the letter writer.
And this one's for my Dad ...
CO 1CSR Lt-Col Sheldon Kidd about to be hit in the face
with a wet sponge at his battalion's family day, held
recently.
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It's
a fact
Take
a letter Maria
Gentlemen, Whilst marching from Portugal to a position,
which commands the approach to Madrid and the French
forces, my officers have been diligently complying with
your requests, which have been sent by HM ship from
London to Lisbon and thence by dispatch to our headquarters.
We have enumerated our saddles, bridles, tents and tent
poles, and all manner of sundry items for which His
Majesty's Government holds me accountable. I have dispatched
reports on the character, wit, and spleen of every officer.
Each item and every farthing has been accounted for,
with two regrettable exceptions for which I beg your
indulgence.
Unfortunately the sum of one shilling and ninepence
remains unaccounted for in one infantry battalion's
petty cash and there has been a hideous confusion as
to the number of jars of strawberry jam issued to one
cavalry regiment during a sandstorm in western Spain.
This reprehensible carelessness may be related to the
pressure of circumstance, since we are at war with France,
a fact which may come as something of a surprise to
you gentlemen in Whitehall.
This brings me to my present purpose, which is to request
elucidation of my instructions from His Majesty's Government
so that I may better understand why I am dragging an
army over these barren plains. I construe that perforce
it must be one of two alternative duties, as given below.
I shall pursue either one with the best of my ability,
but I cannot do both:
- To
train an army of uniformed British clerks in Spain
for the benefit of the accountants and copyboys in
London or perchance,
- To
see to it that the forces of Napoleon are driven out
of Spain.
Your
most obedient servant, Wellington
Extract from the book Essential Militaria, by Nicholas
Hobbes, Atlantic books.
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